Jeer Joker: Jokes in English - анекдоты и шутки на английском

Jokes in English - анекдоты и шутки на английском

A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martinus.
"You mean a martini?" the bartender asks.
The Roman replies, "If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!"

Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He's 0K now.

When William joined the army he disliked the phrase 'fire at will'.

Q: On which side does a chicken have the most feathers?
A: The outside.

Q: What is it that we have in December that we don't have in any other month?
A: The letter D.

Q: What's black and white and red all over?
A1: The newspaper (read all over).
A2: A bashful zebra.
A3: A wounded nun.

Q: Tell me two things you can never eat for breakfast.
A: Lunch and dinner.

Q: What do you call a sleeping bull?
A: A bulldozer.

Q: What can you hold in your left hand that you can't hold in your right hand?
A: Your right elbow.

Q: Which travels faster - heat or cold?
A: Heat. You can catch cold.

Q: What is it you can never see, yet it is always before you?
A: The future.

Q: When was Adam created?
A: Just a little before eve.

Q: Who was the fastest runner in history?
A: Adam. He was first in the human race.

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